MaryElise.com :: Life > 8 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Take Him Back

Has He Cheated?
8 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Take Him Back
By: Mary Elise Chavez
Posted January 2007

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While statistics on extramarital affairs continue to rise, there is surely no shortage of anti-marriage propaganda being spewed by the media at any given time. While many who marry may intend to be monogamous at start, the divorce rate is a clear indicator that committed relationships are struggling in this country.

So what do you do when your partner has cheated on you? Whether to an extreme by sleeping with an outside partner (s), or hiding a secret pornography addiction that you were unaware of. Relational expert Phil McGraw offers these eight questions you should ask yourself if someone has cheated on you. The answers to which will help you determine whether the situation is worth salvaging or not.

Is the situation isolated or a pattern?
Do they own it or make excuses?
Does he have insight, or is he oblivious? Does he understand what it did to you?
Is he sorry for the choice he made or sorry he got caught?
Is he willing to clean the mess up? Does he understand that it’s his job to do whatever it takes to improve and nurture the relationship, or does he want to deny it and move forward.
Is cheating on you out of character for him, or is he insensitive across the board?
Is this a legacy? Did he grow up with role models insensitive to the women in their lives?
If you reinvested into the relationship, and he cheated again, do you have the strength that you could handle that, and recover from it? Or would you be emotionally bankrupt?

Remember, never settle for a relationship that devalues you as a woman. A man of quality is not threatened by a woman of equality. Every woman deserves a nurturing, fulfilling relationship where both partners honor eachother and respect one another.

Additional articles related to this topic (click to visit):

1. Is your relationship at risk for an affair?

2. The Pornography Series: Degrading and Destructive (Analyzing the depth of this deceptive addiction)

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